life seen thru the eyes of a neurotic 20 something gal in search of something, nothing, and everything....but not all at once...I think.

Thursday, November 25, 2010

Brownies anyone?

I decided because I was going to the boyfriend's for turkey day, I needed to bring something to dinner. As my meemaw put it, "No self respecting girl shows up without something delicious add to the dinner or worse, with something picked up out of the grocery store." The disgust hung in the air. Clearly, a good girl must bring something and it must be homemade. Unfortunately, my cooking/baking skills have been the least of my priorities, especially since baking normally involves fat and chocolate, my kryptonite.

Nevertheless, I downloaded some recipes and settled on some classics: brownies and chocolate chip cookies. Who could do poorly with such great recipes? I made my list and headed to the store. 2 stores later and 1 scuffle later (a guy rammed his cart into me numerous times and then had the nerve to not even apologize...manners asshole?! Jeez), I came home and started the brownie recipe.

I carefully measured and followed the instructions as noted. Something was very, very wrong. The batter kept getting thicker and thicker. My little hand mixer motor struggled to blend the mix. Sparks from the hand mixer started and I shut it off immediately. What the hell do I do? I haven't baked in years. How do you thin this out?! Panic set in. I could feel the wetness under my arms. I thought for a minute and then scoured the fridge. Milk. Surely milk will thin it out. I was not sure. Fuck it. If it sucks, I will just have to make do with a Safeway pie. This is not the 1950s Meemaw. Modern girls don't have time for this. I took a swig of milk, said a hail mary, and then poured enough in the bowl until the batter had thinned considerably. I followed the recipe and threw it into the oven. 30 minutes in, I checked the pan. Still not done. 15 minutes later I could smell the chocolate and fat in the air. It must be done. I let it cool overnight and then cut them this morning.

They taste good to me. But I'm not sure the palate of a fat girl who could eat butter and sugar raw is good enough. The boyfriend will need to try and then be honest. I am not taking shitty desert to meet his parents and his 70 something granny from Alabama. Granny will surely expect something divine and Paula Deen worthy. She and Meemaw are old school like that.

On to the chocolate chip cookies. Ugh. The things we do for love.

Tuesday, November 23, 2010

Freak out

Last night the boyfriend came over after his last class. He's been super stressed over finals and his paper. We hung out for awhile, walked the dog, and got ready for bed. I was so happy to see him. Lately, our schedules have been nuts so we've been playing phone tag, grabbing coffee and then splitting to go to the office, library, meetings and other stuff.

I climbed into bed and the poor guy was already passed out. I laid there for a few minutes before he rolled over and hugged me into his chest. For a few minutes I let my mind recall the last few months. How different things were this time last year. I never expected to meet this guy and now here we are not even 6 months into our relationship, taking each other to meet the our respective famililies. All of sudden, the thought of the impending "meet the parents" Thursday and the upcoming trip to Texas, made me feel panic. I could feel my body breaking into a cold sweat. I was having trouble breathing. Luckily, he was dead asleep or else he would have surely known I was having a private freak out in his arms.

All I could think was this is a big deal. It's what I hoped would happen to me...eventually. I just didn't think it really would happen.

I feel like I might have to be sedated to understand he's not a figment of my imagination. He remembers every detail I utter whether it's work stuff or about one of my girlfriends' newest crisis. I'm grateful and scared. It's been a long time since I wanted to be with someone so much I would settle for just hearing their voice or holding their hand. It's so scary to like someone that much.

One step at a time, right? Details to come on the impending meet the parents Turkey Day.

Monday, November 22, 2010

No turning back

The boy is flying home to meet my family for New Year's.

Whoa......this is surreal. I haven't let a guy meet my family since I was 18 years old. He has promised to go to church to please my dad and do whatever it takes to convince them he is the nice guy I know him to be.

Is this really happening?!